Today's gratuitous photo of a hot chick

Adriana Lima. The Brazilian model claims to be saving herself for marriage as well.

Today's gratuitous photo of a hot dude

Rafael Nadal. He plays his first match at the US Open tomorrow.

Cute couple alert

We love Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey together-- totally cute (in LA).

(photo from justjared)

What's more shocking?

That Tom Arnold and soon-to-be-ex-wife Shelby Rose actually lasted 4 years or that Brody Jenner can stomach having sex with Nicole Richie?

Seriously, John. Reconsider.

The doctors are hoping that this outfit is terrible enough for John Mayer to break up with Jessica Simpson.
(Here leaving TRL in NYC)

Dating, but yet to have a conversation

People mag has also confirmed that John Mayer and Jessica Simpson are an item. The duo will last only as long as John doesn't have to talk to her and realize how dumb she is. Please, John. You're smarter than this.

Johnny Mac on Roddipova

Our favorite tennis commentator John McEnroe confirms what we've all been suspecting: he, too, thinks that Maria Sharapova and Addy Roddick are dating, though he isn't positive. Mac also picks Sharapova to win the US Open. The doctors would be very surprised if Maria were to win. Mac says Sharapova has finally gotten used to her ever-growing body (she's almost 6-3!!!).

Is he cute or not?

We all know he's no Brad Pitt, but, hey, Jennifer Aniston's no Angelina Jolie. We can't decide if Vince Vaughn is hot or not... we love that he's tall, we think he's funny, but he's a tad pasty and a tad pudgo...

Beauty and the Beast

We don't know what these two were up to out on the town in LA...but Christina Aguilera's husband Jordan Bratman is not getting any cuter.

Justin Timberlake is friggin' hot

Damn this boy looks hot on the set of Ellen. We're happy he's not wearing that stupid fedora so we can see his perfect face.

Is the new hue not that bad after all?

Cameron Diaz's new hair color is like the woman's face in that one Seinfeld episode. In some lighting it looks terrible and in others it looks great. In this shot it looks great.
(Diaz and fellowing annoying actress Drew Barrymore out in West Hollywood)

Olsen twins fulfilling their goal to look like they're from outer space

Good god these girls look freaky. Are they possessed? Do they have bad teeth??? Why don't they ever show them?
(Here the two androids are on some Canadian TV show)

Matt Leinart knocks up basketball player

Arizona Cardinal quarterback Matt Leinart is going to be a dad. Apparently, Leinart and 20-year old USC basketball player Brynn Cameron are expecting a baby. We are sure this pregnancy was planned. Wasn't he with Paris Hilton not too long ago? Boy gets around.

Paris Hilton has started dating Ice-T

Paris has been so distraught with her pitiful music career that she immediately started dating rapper Ice-T and made multiple stops at In N Out Burger.

John Mayer has already broken up with Jessica after seeing her in this outfit

US magazine claims that John Mayer and Jessica Simpson are dating. We think that it will end as soon as the doctor gives her the ok that she can talk again. If not, it will end as soon as John Mayer gets a look at this photo. Earth to Jessica: the extensions ain't working for you.

Kevin Costner loves "hilarious" Ashton's jokes

Kevin Costner hugs Ashton Kutcher after learning that he was the only person who sat through the Postman in its entirety.

The "stars" of that singing with celebrities show

Chris Jericho (who cares)
Lucy Lawless (who cares)
Cheech Marin (ok)
Carly Patterson (great gymnast)
Alfonso Ribeiro (He'll be the best)
Jai Rodriguez (have no idea what he adds to Queer Eye)
Hal Sparks (who cares)
Lea Thompson (who cares)

Kid Rock just found out Paris Hilton's CD is a flop

What will come first? The end of Pam and Kid Rock's first marriage or a Suri appearance?

Too Cute!

Heidi Klum and her son Henry playing in the sand.

Shocker! Paris Hilton's Publicist Hates his Job

Paris Hilton's publicist Elliot Mintz used to work with musical genius John Lennon. Now he works with musical moron Paris Hilton. He claimed to the New York Times about his job working for Paris, "If I’m still doing this 12 months from now, I will have failed.” The article also noted that he drinks a bottle of chardonnay a day. Going from John Lennon to Miss STD would drive us to drink ourselves into a stupor too.

Shannon Elizabeth has old lady legs

Shannon Elizabeth- who has no career- mentioned that she could have been a professional tennis player. Hayden Christensen, who also played tennis once claimed the same thing. Newsflash: "could have been" does not mean that you are a pro tennis player. You probably would have gotten beat by any mediocre Southern California high school player in about 45 minutes.

Who am I?

Click on the comments page to find the answer.

Praise the Lord!

We don't have to hear anything stupid from Jessica Simpson's mouth for awhile because she's been ordered by doctors not to talk. Hopefully she'll never grace us with her stupid utterances ever again. Here's another request- don't sing ever again either. (From Perez Hilton)

More attention and money for the world's most private celebrity

Oh Goody! Jennifer Aniston who hates publicity and attention on her will be a spokesperson for Nike. Good thing Nike's just a small brand that no one has ever heard of. This will help her in her quest to never be noticed or bothered again. (Reported by Just Jared)

Jamie Lynn Sigler hangs out with a total has been

What on earth has happened to Andrew Keegan's face? He used to be hot-- but he used to have a career. LeAnn Rimes claimed he was an a-hole after they broke up. We saw him at the airport and he was doing everything he could to get attention on himself. How did he get invited to this Emmy party?

US Open News

Number 3 seed Ivan Ljubicic of Croatia was upset in straight sets by Spanish hottie Feliciano Lopez.

James Denton Plays Guitar- hopefully no original music

Another actor wants to be a musician. Maybe he'll tour with the Bacon Brothers.
(James Denton played God knows what at an Emmys after party)

Guess who this is?

Click on the comments page for the answer.

Paris: The World's Biggest Moron

Here's Paris' great week:
Paris' album sold a paltry 75,000 copies -next week sales to go down more than 50%
Cher's son Elijah Blue claims that Paris gave him an STD (we don't doubt it)
Paris dissed her ex-friend Tara Reid while trying to get into the club Hyde in LA
Paris wants to go to outer space on Richard Branson's rocket ship
We're all praying this spaceship gets built immediately!!! Just go away!!!